week of 7/17/02
 
 
 

Unholy Mischief and Coming of Age
Fuhrman’s posthumous work a delightful tale with a sub-par cinematic rendering
By Gary Carden

The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys by Chris Fuhrman. Athens: The University of Georgia Press, 1994. $34.95 — 187 pp.


In 1990, Chris Fuhrman was on the brink of success. The 29-year-old writer had completed the final draft of his novel when he was stricken with cancer. He died in May 1991. Some of the author’s close friends decided to get Fuhrman’s novel published anyway, and after a considerable number of delays and setbacks, the University of Georgia Press finally published The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys in 1994. However the book never attracted a large audience .... until recently.

For several years now, Fuhrman’s wicked little novel about the devious doings of a group of eighth-graders in a Catholic school in Savannah has acquired something of a cult status. Although Fuhrman’s audience was enthusiastic, it remained modest. Then Robert Redford’s Sundance Studio recently announced that they intended to release an “adaptation” with some heavy-duty talents, (including Jodi Foster). The film premiered at this year’s Sundance Festival and critical response has been “mixed.”

However, there is an increased interest in Chris Fuhrman’s novel, and the Sundance Channel is currently airing a promotional segment about the making of the film. Well, The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys has languished (unread) on my shelf for six years now. (I originally bought it because of the wonderful cover which is a parody of an E.C. comic.) The enthusiasm attending the Sundance adaptation prompted me to take it down and read it. I’m afraid I made some interesting discoveries. As near as I can tell, the film and the novel only have a superficial resemblance.

Let’s begin with the novel. Set in Savannah during the early 70s, this little novel chronicles the rites of passage of five delightful eighth-graders — Francis Doyle, Tim Sullivan and their three closest friends who are all altar boys at Blessed Heart Catholic Church. The “common chords” that unite the boys are artistic talent, a love of comic books (especially the infamous EC Comics) and a healthy contempt for authority. These shared interests lead them to produce a comic book which contains an imaginative rendering of the nuns (with special attention to the obese, one-legged Sister Rosaria) and the male teachers at Blessed Heart in a sexual orgy called “Sodom vs. Gomorrah — 74.”

When the comic falls into the hands of Father Kavanagh, he threatens severe disciplinary action and a crisis looms. All the creative energies of the group are devoted to devising a plan to avoid being expelled from Blessed Heart just a week prior to graduation. The scheme — developed by Tim, a small, brilliant and decidedly unstable boy — involves the capture and transport of a wild bobcat from a wildlife reserve eight miles from the school. What will that accomplish? Well, according to Tim, it is a “diversionary tactic” — if the bobcat is released in the school, the ensuing panic will cause the school officials to forget about the blasphemous comic book. The premise is a little shaky, but then, what can you expect from five overly imaginative eighth-graders?

However, there is more going on in The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys than a clandestine journey to drug and kidnap a bobcat. Francis, the narrator of this tale, is in the throes of first love — well, “lust” is more apt. The object of his attention — the nubile Margie Flynn — is a failed suicide with an astonishing array of sexual problems of her own. Obviously, Francis and Margie are a volatile combination. There are other distractions: the civil rights movement in Savannah (circa 1973) is peaking and the nights are filled with sirens and angry shouts. Also, the majority of the rebellious students in The Dangerous Lives of Alter Boys come from dysfunctional families and suffer from either “affluent neglect” or, like Francis, brutal abuse. Beneath the juvenile banter and laughter, Fuhrman reveals a poignant theme of loneliness and youthful despair. Drugs and alcohol are easily obtained. Shoplifting is something of an art form and membership in the group’s artistic “club” makes it a requirement.

Now, about the movie, or more specifically, the promotional trailer for the Sundance “adaptation.” The majority of the episodes in the film appear to be “extrapolations.” Sister Rosaria has been converted into Sister Assumptia, a motorcycle-riding nun (Jodie Foster) which the artistic talents and imaginations of the budding artists have converted into their nemesis, Nunzilla, the villain of their comic book, the “Atomic Trinity.” Apparently, a considerable portion of the film is a series of lurid animation sequences produced by Todd MacFarlane. (Margie Flynn becomes Sorcerella who is “searching for her stolen pearl” and she is aided by a trio of superheroes, Captain Asskicker, Skeleton Boy and Major Screw.

Now, as imaginative as all of this sounds, it has no basis in the original book — which, apparently, none of the film critics have read! There is also a disconcerting scene in the film in which Francis and Tim find a dying dog on the road and the incident acts as a catalyst on Tim, affirming his conviction that the world is meaningless and cruel.

I can only conclude that much of the action in Fuhrman’s original work is no longer “acceptable” and that the creators of the film found it necessary to “invent.” For example, Tim often has fantasies about taking a machine-gun to school. In this pre-Columbine tale, Fuhrman’s troubled kids are definitely not “politically correct.” Although I do find the film’s basic premise — that comics fueled the youthful imagination through much of the last century — I have trouble accepting this “adaptation.” For me, the integrity of the book has been violated, converted into a strange mutant, a kind of cinematic clone that — like poor Tim Sullivan — will find neither an appreciative audience or understanding.

(Gary Carden is a writer, storyteller and lecturer whose book, Mason Jars in the Flood, was recently named Book of the Year by the Appalachian Writers Association. He can be reached at gcarden498@aol.com.)