The
Naturalist’s Corner 2004 Year-In Review By
Don Hendershot
Fifty-two
weeks of the Naturalist’s Corner — that’s enough
to keep the old shredder busy.
Some of our proudest moments at the NC are when we are on the
leading edge. When we bring you important news and issues regarding
the natural world first or news and issues that have been overlooked
by other mainstream ultra-liberal media outlets.
A couple of columns come to mind from this genre. One (3/23/04)
paid homage to golf hunters, or golfers, as they like to be called.
Sure golf gets a lot of ritzy coverage with countless magazines
and TV, but the Naturalist’s Corner was first to point out
the debt that society in general owes these intrepid heroes.
“From early spring through late fall in temperate climates
and nearly year-round in warmer climes, these dedicated golfers,
Sisyphus-like, trudge the meadows, fields and clearings, using sticks
to drive the nefarious golfs back into their holes, knowing they
will only have to do it again.
“Golfs apparently evolved in Scotland around the middle-to
late-15th century. They are small, round, extremely resilient critters.
They are a puzzlement to modern science and little is known about
their biology. They have no appendages at all, yet they seem to
procreate and are apt to show up in almost any setting from a country
club lawn to a muddy marsh pond to a dentist’s office. They
are able to stay submerged in mud and/or water for years with no
obvious ill effects. In fact, if you have ever tried to chase one
back into its hole you know they will head for the water the first
chance they get.”
Now you won’t find that kind of in-depth golf reporting
in Sports Illustrated. But, I must confess, I have help. There is
just no way one person can keep abreast of all that’s going
on out there and do all the research. Thank goodness for NC fact
checker and researcher Al Lookitup. If I don’t know –
Al Lookitup.
The NC was also your source in 2004 (11/24/04) for groundbreaking
insight into the habits and biology of the rare and wily, wild tofurky.
If you go to www.smokymountainnews.com and pull up that edition
you will see that I was unsuccessful in my attempt to bag a wild
tofurky. But, man I was close – so close. And I will wager,
there’s not an editor or writer at Outdoor Life or Sports
Afield that has had a wild tofurky Thanksgiving meal.
Sometimes, even with the best intelligence and most thorough research,
things don’t turn out as they seem. Remember the WMDs? Well.
Al and I both fell victim to faulty intelligence briefings.
After intense soul-searching, we decided it was in the public
interest to go with the best information we had and warn citizens
of the impending invasion of Brood X (see 4/28/04). According to
reports, the threat was imminent. The invading army of 17-year cicadas
was said to number in the tens of billions.
There are some who say, because the invasion never materialized,
that the NC was given faulty intelligence. We believe differently.
Because of the accuracy of our reporting and the timeliness of our
reporting and the cosmopolitan distribution of the Smoky Mountain
News, we feel the invading red-eyed hordes knew they had been found
out and retreated back into their subterranean hideouts.
This column ends the 2004 cycle for the NC. But we pledge to do
our utmost in 2005 to continue providing the kind of coverage you’ve
come accustomed to. We know that by relying on our instincts and
working hard to stay on the cutting edge we may occasionally fly
in the face of conventional wisdom and standards.
That’s where the rest of our staff comes into play. Helen
Waite leads our public relations department. So remember if there
are any concerns over the reporting in the NC, you can always go
to Helen Waite.